In case you were wondering, Covid hasn’t prevented the DMV (motto: Making life annoying one person—slowly—at a time) from living up to its standards. Around these parts you have to make a timed-entry appointment to see someone at DMV in person (they stopped answering their phones months ago). But finding an appointment slot within a month of the current date is harder than getting tickets to see Lady Gaga. Most appointments are scheduled several weeks, or months, out. You can try to find an earlier opening by hanging out online every day and trolling the dozen DMV sites in the region to see if a slot opens up sooner. Good luck. At least Lady Gaga knows how to show you a good time.

I waited two months to get my mom’s car title changed into my name, which I did through the mail. Next, I have to register the car and get the plates, which I’m attempting to do in person (thinking it would take less time—silly me!). My appointment wait time was 4 weeks; and that appointment day was today. I had to take time off work to drive 30 minutes to the DMV. I arrived early because they were strict about being on time. I waited 15 minutes before going in the building. I waited another 15 minutes before my turn at the window. As soon as I got to the window, the clerk says, “Our computers are a little unhealthy at the moment.” Translation: “Our lawmakers won’t provide funds to update our computer hardware and software, last updated during the Clinton administration.”

Apparently, our lawmakers aren’t concerned that tens of thousands of taxpayers statewide are inconvenienced. I guess efficiency has no value. The clerk told me to have a seat and wait it out, along with the other four people in line ahead of me. Ten minutes and another five people in line later, I had to get back home for a work meeting. At least the clerk had the courtesy to write on my hall pass that I could come back at another time convenient for me instead of waiting 4+ weeks for yet another appointment.

I know, I know, privileged-person problems. At least the waiting area had windows, even if the day was cold and rainy.